© Akoto Alexander
In Kwame Nkrumah University of Science and Technology, I Professor Vincent Awude was a Head of Department for the Linguistics Department. I was very hardworking and time conscious on my work, that my students and even fellow colleagues feared me with my work. I usually teach without any text book or pamphlet, in fact I was seen as a genius and had received countless awards and citations across the country and in most African universities. My story starts here in one of my classes:
Class Sec: Today is Monday, so am going to call Dr. Samuel Ewusi Acheampong for the first class after……….
Students: After that, Professor Awude will come and take over with the Linguistic theory.
(Class secretary goes out to call Dr. Ewusi Acheampong and returns shortly with the lecturer)
Dr Acheampong: Good morning students.
Students: Good morning sir (In a chorus voice).
Dr Acheampong: Do you know what we are going to study today?
(There is total silence and the class secretary Adane Dankyi stands to answer)
Adane: Sir, we don’t know.
Dr Acheampong: You see, as I always say, You students are lazy and don’t prepare before coming to class. Well, prepare yourself when I come your way next time. (He leaves the class and comes back in five minutes time)
So do you know what we will study today?
(The students had earlier decided to say ‘YES’ to save themselves from the experience where Dr. Acheampong did not teach them anything earlier. So the whole class shouted “YES SIR”)
Oh now that you say you know, then there’s no need to teach you anything again. Bye.
He leaves the class again, the students now decide that when he comes in again, some will say ‘YES” and others will say “NO”. So when Adane went to call him in again, he walked in pompously.
Dr Acheampong: Do you know what we will learn this time?
Students: Yes! No! Yes! No! Yes! No
Dr. Acheampong: Oh nice. In that case those who said ‘Yes’ should teach those who said ‘No’.
Have a nice day. Bye.
(Dr Acheampong exits the class without teaching the students anything, the students murmurs out in protestations).
Adane: I can see Dr. Acheampong does not want to teach us anything today, so I will go and call Prof to come and teach us.
(A few minutes later, Professor Awude comes in)
Students: Sir you are welcome
Professor: Thank you students. Today is a nice Monday and we are going to continue our lecture on the topics we started last week. Who can tell me what African symbols stand for?
(One of the students raises her hand).
Prof: Yes Gertrude.
(She stands out to answer the question beautifully)
Prof: Thank you very much. His phone vibrates and he looks at his phone screen and his watch. I am sorry students, I will have to postpone the rest of this lecture to another time, I have to attend to the head of departments meeting. We will continue tomorrow morning at exactly 6am. You know I don’t entertain lateness so don’t be a victim, meanwhile Gertrude see me in my office now before I leave for the meeting. Have a wonderful day students.
(After the professor has left, Gertrude goes to speak to her friend)
Gertrude: Lizzy, what do you suppose Prof wants to see me for?
Lizzy: I don’t know, maybe he wants to complement you for your performance in his class today.
Gertrude: Come on,stop that funny joke.
(Meanwhile at Prof’s office)
Secretary: Yes sir
Prof: Take this cheque and cash it for me at the Ghana Commercial bank branch in town, I repeat in town.
Secretary leaves immediately and after a short while a gentle knock sounds at the door
Prof: Come in (pretends to be surprised). Oh its you Gertrude, please sit down.
Gertrude: Thank you sir. Please you requested I see you.
Prof: Oh yes, I called you here to tell you about your last semester exams, Gertrude you performed very poorly. Your grades are so bad that the academic board will have no other option than to rusticate you. I am very sorry that this must happen to you, but that is how things stand as at now.
Gertrude: Stares absent mindedly at the professor and after sometime burst into tears..
Prof: Take your time my dear.
Gertrude: Oh sir, how can such a thing happen to me? I studied really hard for this exams, I know I really put my best in the exams. My father will slaughter me when he hears of this. Oh! Oh! Oh sir can’t you help me in anyway to finish my course at this premium university? Am going to be the first graduate in my family and should this happen my dreams and aspirations will be shuttered. Am going to be a laughing stock in my neighbourhood.
Prof: Ehh, I am not sure, but let me see maybe I can arrange something on your behalf.
Gertrude: Please help me sir and I will give you anything you want. I will pay any amount of money you request.
Prof: No! No! No my dear girl. I can’t possibly take money from you. All the same I may be able to help you only that it will take a small sacrifice on your part also.
Gertrude: Wears a faint smile. There is nothing I won’t do to ensure that I stay in this university and complete my course.
Prof: Then everything will depend on you now.
Gertrude: I don’t quite understand what you mean sir?
Prof: Gertrude, you are not a kid are you? Come closer, I may be able to help you as I said, but you will have to pay in kind because you know money is not my problem.
Gertrude: Sir what do you mean by paying you in kind? I don’t understand.
Gertrude: Sir what do you mean by paying you in kind? I don’t understand.
Prof: Look you are a full grown woman, and a very beautiful one as that. You have got a well built body and nice looking. Your eyes, hair, hips, flat tummy, backside and your boobs drives me crazy anytime I set sight on you, in fact you are just wonderful!!! I believe God took time to mould you on the Sabbath day. Your boobs are very heavy just the way I love it, your hips is just like the guitar shape and for your behind, oh gosh it looks like a swollen turmoil.
Gertrude: And what about all that sir? It is help I need, not complements.
Prof: Looking at your make up too, can’t you bribe your way through this mess you find yourself in now? After all it wouldn’t take the whole day or your lifetime.
Gertrude: (very shocked with the statement Prof just made). My goodness Prof!!! Are you talking about SEX?
Prof: You are more clever than your results proved.
Gertrude: Prof what do you take me? A prostitute? No you can’t get me that way.
(She stands up and makes her way towards the door).
Prof: Well its your future and I was just trying to help you for just five minutes of pleasure, something you will even enjoy more than myself. You can choose between your future and your body. Feel free and go. I careless.
(Gertrude after hearing this statement stops with her hand on the door knob and burst into tears once again)
Gertrude: Sir please, can’t you ask for anything else apart from this?
Prof: I have told you what I want, if you are not interested, you know the way out. Have a good day.
Gertrude: But don’t you think that God will see what you are doing to me and punish you severely?
Prof: (laughs out loud) Don’t you see the roof over my head, and more over my office is at the down floor of a storey building? God will never see me!!!. So what do you finally say to this proposal? Are you IN or OUT?
Gertrude: Silence for a while and finally speakes “since it looks like I have no other choice, I better give in to the offer at hand.
Prof: That is a very wise decision you have taken, I can assure you of good grades after our wonderful expedition. Get your things ready and lets get ready to rambo.
(Later, they both get into the Professor’s car and he drives straight to the Golden Tulip Hotel where they take some drinks and after they move to the room the Professor has booked. As they enter the room, Prof is in a rush to undress Gertrude)
Gertrude: Prof are you sure you won’t reconsider this extreme measure you have taken?
Prof: Look Gertrude, we came here to complete the deal we had. I had to pay dollars for this room we find ourselves in. I brought you here to a five star hotel because I want to treat you special.
As matured that we are you know what followed next…………………………..
Prof: Gertrude, you were sweet in bed.
Gertrude: (Angrily slaps the Professor). Sir, I hate being made fun of after you have used me. You have had your part of the deal, its left for you to fulfil mine too.
Prof: What was that for young lady?(still holding his slapped face) I don’t go back on my promises my dear. So what grades do you want?
Gertrude: I want A+ in every subject you teach. And after that, I would like you to leave my life alone.
Prof: (beaming with smiles). That would not be a problem.
(Gertrude leaves the room banging the door behind her in frustration. She heads to the school and moves to the auditoruim and weeps bitterly. She see Lizzy coming towards her direction and she quickly dries her tears to avoid suspicion).
…to be continued