Heart Desire – Episode 5

HEART DESIRE – Episode 5

A story by Jochrine Kunda

BLESSINGS

***I kept tossing and turning as I thought of the mystery guy and hadn’t felt like sleeping the whole night

“What you’re doing is wrong, what if he’s got a wife and kids you wouldn’t want to separate them, would you?”

Something inside of me said but my inner woman responded with a squeaky voice

“Oh! to hell with that rubbish let’s just listen to what the heart says”

I grabbed my hair tight hoping it would cause pain so that my attention would be shifted to something else, I was just about to have a wink of sleep when the alarm that was set on Mary’s phone rang and it meant for me to get up and start making fritters but I wasn’t complaining because I was excited about meeting Thomas. I took a bath and wore a pink flowery dress that was slightly above the knees which I only wore when going to Church and tied my long natural hair in a neat bun, I placed my wrapper in a black plastic bag and wore my red pumps. I tiptoed out of the house hoping no one would see me because they’d question why I wore the dress that day

“A few more steps and I’m out”

I said while I looked behind to check if grandma was awake until I bumped into Mary and she screamed

Mary: WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU HAVE YOU GONE…..blind?

***She said the last part after she saw what I wore and she just shook her head***

Mary: are you going to church?

Me: umm….no…not really

Mary: then what really?

Me: I’m…. I…I’m just running out of clothes to wear since I haven’t done my laundry this whole week

Mary: oh! Okay now leave already

I ran out with the bucket until I got to a distance to catch my breath and walked to the market happy because it wasn’t grandma who caught me otherwise I was going to be roasted, I got to the market and went to my spot and all the girls who were chatting went quiet and I felt their eyes on me until one talkative girl laughed out loud and clapped both hands in the air then she spoke at the top of her voice

Girl 1: looks like someone is trying to get the attention of blessers by dressing all up and advertising herself here

Girl 2: that’s if she hasn’t got two or three already coz you never know what’s with people who are silent

Girl 3: Mmm girl then she’s cheap for them to be buying her a dress from a Salaula store ( a shop where second hand clothes are sold) coz others wear expensive clothes

Girl 1: yet she wears one like the one Bana Malulu wore in an episode of Chintelelwe

They laughed and I heard others also gossiping but I didn’t let all that get to me because I thought of Thomas who was going to come and see me, it made me wonder what they’d say when he came for me.

The sun was scorching, a sign showing that it was mid day and there was no sign of Thomas so I thought he’d come in the evening coz he probably was occupied with work. I had an empty bucket before sunset and I knew that I was supposed to go home but I sat waiting for him wondering what was keeping him away from showing up, the girls all looked at me like I’d lost my mind or something but I ignored them totally and found what they said “when you look good, you feel good to be true”. They left one after the other and I was the only one remaining so I took my bucket and held it tight against my chest slowly walking home with the feeling of disappointment all over me

” How foolish of me to think that a man as fine as Thomas would want anything to do with a cursed girl like me, I’m of low class, uneducated and HIV positive while he’s the exact opposite. Maybe God just made me meet him so that he could prevent me from taking my life by him stealing the pills from me, I’ll just concentrate on my useless life because I’m nothing”

I said trying to bear the huge lump I had on my throat

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VERONICA

*** Was I in love, people? Mwelwa had been all sweet after I made him a part of my life, he got me gifts every now and then and treated me like a queen.

I told mom about him trying to build a relationship with Jane and her reaction wasn’t so good but I understood her anger coz she had to be there for me until the time I gave birth and she was the one who supported Jane like her own so I understood what she was feeling but after a lot of convincing she finally accepted and gathered family members and he paid money for the damages which happened after he formally informed her.

Mwelwa had left work early and had come to pick me up since we were going to look for a day care center for Jane and that meant everything to me, we were in his car and I’d occupied the front seat while Jane was at the back playing with some toys and the atmosphere was great but it had to be spoiled by Mwelwa’s ringing phone which was on Bluetooth and he answered

Mwelwa: Sarah

***That was his wife***

Sarah: sweetheart where are you? I’ve just been told that you left your workplace a long time ago

Mwelwa: you really want to know where I am?

Sarah: yes, yes

***She said with so much eagerness***

Mwelwa: I went to see my baby and her mother and we’re going to look for a day care center for her

***She sniffed and I could tell that she was crying***

Sarah: isn’t it enough that you and your family members had to go behind my back and pay for her damages?…… Look babe, I’m willing to accept your child as my own just don’t go to her, don’t give up on us

Me: uh uh, sweetheart just bear your own it doesn’t ki*ll….. that’s if you’re as strong as me

Sarah: SHUT UP! YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING SLUT…….

Mwelwa: HEY…I won’t allow you to use foul language in front of my daughter so I’m hanging up

I could hear her sobbing then I chuckled lightly and he dropped the call.

We found her one and I was worried about the fees which were expensive but Mwelwa didn’t seem to mind and said that he wanted to spoil his only daughter rotten, we then had lunch and did he later drove us back home with a lot of shopping bags and I was sure that he’d spent almost all of his monthly income on us. I was even afraid to sleep in fear that I might wake up and find it all a dream…

To be continued...