TRUTHS ABOUT LYING

© Arinze S. Chiji

Part A

Lies to me

A little lie to myself.
A little lie to myself.
The reason why I cannot tell.
Why should I lie? I cannot tell.
A look in the mirror.
A glimpse of my failure.
A patch of my mistakes.
My future I live to forsake.

Covered in layers of deceit,
My burning desire not to be
Revealed; revealed even to myself
Would be my undoing.
A little lie to myself
Won’t hurt anybody.
Losing in bits, my reality.

Lies to her

She had so many layers.
Layers that had gotten thick.
As thick as the oak tree
It ran deeper than its roots.
Concealed in powder
All shades and colour
As thick as chowder
Unable to cower;
Cower to the whispers in her head
However still and small, the whispers
Echoed loud.
However still and small, the whispers
Echoed long.
Till it fades away.
Unrecognisable and lost in motion.
Merry in self-deceit and none to tell the truth.
It was the layers upon layers.
A recipe for self-destruction.

Lies to him

The cool evening breeze against our skin
On a date with the sent one, Angela.
A sip from the glass of champagne and a
Few laughs.
All went well
All went well.
A man who was ready to share her dreams
A man to take her out of poverty
A man that would guard, cherish and protect her.
All went well
All went well
A woman who was ready to accept him
A woman with whom to build a fortune
A woman to guard, cherish and protect.
All went sour
All went sour
She was never ready to accept a pauper
In a borrowed suit. A common driver whose
Boss was kind enough to pay for dinner.
All went sour
All went sour
He thought she would accept him.
Reduced to a jackpot ticket out of poverty.
It tore him
It tore him.

Lies to us

Good roads, electricity, pipe borne water,
A hope for tomorrow,
‘A better future for your children’,
Dark men conceited in dark ways promised.
‘A vote for me is a vote for the future’
A future of hunger, pain, hardship and disease.
Clothed in deceit were the missiles thrown
At us; and we not dodging gladly took the hit.

It was not the first hit.
The second hit would have been a mistake.
The third a lesson.
But the twentieth was our choice.
Stripped of all the sense of humanity,
We look up to divinity.
Left with nothing not even our integrity,
We crawled back to insanity.

The lies we tell ourselves so that we sleep at night.
The chains in our minds so that we might not fight.

Lies to them

If you need to make them stay, you tweak reality.
Not just to make them stay, but to eat out of your palms.
It is food to their soul, as melting butter to taste buds.
Soothing, savoury, relaxing and somewhat divine.
Who needs to hear the truth when it will cause much pain?
Who needs to face reality when it can be tweaked for a gain?
A pain that can be avoided for a second but on a revenge spree for hours.
A gain that lasts a minute till it all comes crashing like a house of cards.

Take your truth and be gone through the front door.
A lie will take us through the backdoor, no spotlight.
Forgetting the darkness of the backdoor and how it
Consumes every ray of light is our crucifix.

Part B

Manly man

Meeting my lady was a miracle
A miracle quickly turned debacle.
I wooed and she cooed
Accepted my advances and the rest was history

The wedding bells jingled
As guests invited and uninvited mingled
I could and we should
Abandon the wedding charade for the honeymoon

Ending the momentous rush so soon,
Unwrapping my honey lady under the moon.
I looked and she looked
Beyond the hotel sheets, uncertainty watched all night.

We went along and made a home
A boy and girl to call our own
A brood, our brood
Precious little ones to guide and protect at all times

The bitter endless hours at work
A return home to a feet pierced by fork
I screamed and she screamed
At the circus the entire living space had turned

I was done and she was done
This was not the initial deal
Nobody told us it would be stormy
We hoped for a smooth sail
But we were too far gone
In this mindless mud
To return.
I was done and she was done
She didn’t look good for me anymore
I didn’t wash up for her anymore
Surprises was never a thing
Nothing surprised us anymore
We await the silver days
The silver days when death snatches
One of us first.

Womanly woman

I gave up myself too soon
He was the man of my fairy tale ending
I led myself to believe
That it was the best thing, that it was the
Best thing since coldstone.
How quickly I got consumed in my wifely
Duties, forgetting my living duties.
I forgot to live for myself and I lived for him alone
I looked after his children, my children, our children.

I blame him.
He promised heaven on a silver platter
But I got a three course meal from hell’s kitchen.
I blame my children.
I was the folk song sweet mother
Trashed and tossed when they got older and moved out

I blame my mother.
Be a good wife and obey
She didn’t make a strong woman from this dust
I blame my friends
There in the good times
Deserted me in the darkest moments like a stray cat

If I had a father, I would blame him.
If we were tenants, I would blame the landlord.
If I went to church, I would blame the vicar.
If I knew Mr President, I would blame him too.
I would blame anyone but myself.

If only they knew
Be like me and live the glamour,
Fame, good grades and priceless humour.
The hallway in my high school
I painted with colours of being cool.
A friend to all, a friend to none
The race to the top, is goal number one

Be like me and live the darkness
I say darkness, yes I say darkness.
It’s all I see, but they see something else
I knew when darkness crept in
I welcomed her like a good being
She stayed long in Annie’s inn

Wake up Annie! It’s time for school
No mummy! I want to talk to you!
Shook me off my bed, a pat on the head
To talk when the day is done, I heard.
I heard those repeated letters and line
I didn’t bother anymore, letting darkness dine

Perfect daughter running destiny’s miles like bolt
Perfect student acing chemistry, call her the GOAT
Perfect friend making us feel good every time
Perfect lies was all it took all the time
Perfect lies to cover up my blood stained
Innocence and living this dark imperfections.