Opana – Episode 55

Opana – Episode 55

© Akoto Alexander

Albert: Daddy I hope you are not trying to find a way to join the list of my worse enemies? You know this silly joke of yours could earn a bullet in your head if you were not my dad and losing you could be a big lose to me.

Boss: Hey that is a gentle way to threaten your dad you know, I love the man you are growing up to be. But honestly that guy dealt with you mercilessly, if not for the fact that you are my son and I have known you all my life like I will mistake you for someone else my son.

Albert: Can we please change the topic dad because I don’t find your jokes amusing and it is only boiling my blood within my veins. Dad I feel like strangling someone this very moment (squeeze the banana he has in his hand)

Boss: Easy my son, learn to control your temper before you channel it to the wrong person. Have the spies you appointed to get this guy surfaced with any information about him yet?

Albert: Not yet dad, their tactics and efforts to me is very slow and I want to do things in my own way, I want to do the Rambo style techniques but it’s because of you that is why am taking things easy.

Boss: It is good you know am around that is why you are taking things easy. See the police are on my tail right now concerning the death of that swine I gave visa to hell some days ago. I have warned the boys not to engage themselves in anything bloody until I give them the clearance and with that even, it must be in my presence.

Albert: (hits his hand on the dinning table) So does it mean that fool will go unpunished? Dad will you sit down and watch some silly idiot disfigure the face of your only child and go freely?

Boss: (gnashes his teeth as he talks with his hands clinching a fist) Never ever in your naive life raise your voice at me again son, you know no one plays with the lion’s child and goes freely without facing the wrath of the lion himself. I am the king of the hoods and ghettos in Africa, when I talk it becomes law, when I sneeze it breeds trouble, when I snap a finger heads starts rolling. See the slow movement of the lion is not a sign of cowardry but rather they are tailored and calculated moves to grab its prey, the man you are seeing seated next to you is worth billions in the field of havoc, commotion and imflecting pains to mankind. If Iddi Amin is wicked than me then it was because he was a dictator and he chewed snakes. If Adolf Hitler was mean more than me, then it’s because he was in the army and brought war to the world. If Osama Bin Laden was wicked than me then, it was because of the plane he bombed on 9/11 in the Sates, see my small head is worth over 5000 terabytes of wickedness. The hunter doesn’t discuss things that goes on in the forest but I want you to be rest assured that so far as am your dad and I am still counted among the living, the Controller of the drug Game in Accra, the Provost of drug Cartel in Ghana, the Admiral of drug Conglomerate in West Africa and the Field Marshal of drug business in Africa, I will fish that guy out in no time. Does the golden fish has a place to hide in a fish pond?

Albert: No dad, there is no hiding place for a golden fish in a fish pond.

Boss: Good so watch my steps and follow carefully because some places I step might be very slippery. My enemies always fall when they try to walk on the path I thread but you being my son I will show you the codes and secrets to overcome those barriers. Join me take my food for there are a lot of things for us to catch up with. There are some of my businesses and deals that I will like you to spearhead in the coming days and I pray you don’t disappoint me because they are worth thousands of dollars.

Albert: Disappoint you? Then unless your blood doesn’t flow in my veins or am not your biological son. I am poised up for any task or mission you delegate me to do daddy, I am giving you my word and I promise to make you proud of me daddy.

Boss: Am happy to hear that my son, it’s because of you that is why am worrying myself this way, this business empire am building will be yours soon so I want you to learn everything about this business in an accelerated speed because my competitors are trailing me with a twin turbo engine.

At the Roadside:

Michael Ansah: My dear why don’t you spend the night here, it’s already late and you going home alone isn’t safe. You know how dangerous the world is now Herty and you being a lady makes you very vulnerable to any form of attack easily.

Henrietta Barnor: Am going to be okay my dear, you worry yourself for nothing. The important thing is for me to get a car home, my kid sister will be by the gate to open the door for me the moment I get home. You if after 30minutes I don’t get a car I will give in to your demand and spend the night with you guys, hope you will play the role of a good host?

Michael Ansah: Of course Herty, be rest assured that the bed is going to be given to you to sleep peacefully and no funny movements will take place, you know first impression matters a lot.

Henrietta Barnor: I know you guys are too gentle and civilized so you won’t try anything silly. But my greatest concern is at dawn, I once went to sleep in my junior brothers room one time and how they fired missiles at me at dawn erh, if I didn’t run back to my room like I will die from inhaling toxic waste into my lungs.

Michael Ansah: Hahahaha oh I now get your point and worry clearly, you are afraid of the farts you might receive from us at dawn, well I can’t promise you a missile free night as sometimes the rockets launch automatically even when we are not aware with the involuntary action but I believe we will try and comport ourselves seeing your presence in the room.

Henrietta Barnor: Hahahaha talking about the involuntary action, my elder sister’s baby once release a very loud and heavy missile that got her crying after the sound came out from her. That night the whole house laughed about the incident that my dad nearly chocked to death, it’s one of the funniest day that I won’t forget ever in my life.

Michael Ansah: I guess your little girl got scared with the sound that came out of her. Hey looking at the time the 30minutes you requested for is about to elapse and there is no sign of a taxi coming our way. Am afraid you will have to spend the night with us.

Henrietta Barnor: (feeling bad and disappointed but sees a car light from the far end) Hey look at that side, there is a car coming and I believe it’s a taxi, please let’s wait for it to pass first, if it is taxi and it’s empty I will go with it but if not then am going to spend the night with you guys. Hope you are okay with the deal am bringing on-board.

Michael Ansah: Do I have a choice? Let’s wait and see the outcome of the approaching vehicle.

After some time of waiting for the approaching vehicle, the vehicle turns out to be that of Henrietta’s taxi.

Henrietta Barnor: Adamu what are you still doing around this place?

Adamu: Madam as I dropped my boss here earlier on, I decided to go and turn the car at the extreme end but the car started jerking so I got down to service it and the moment I got it fixed this lady hired me to drop her in town.

Henrietta Barnor: For you to be driving at this time of the day is even a mystery to me Adamu. I have told you on several occasions that, let only a professional mechanic touch my car when it’s at fault so why didn’t you park the car when it was jerking or whatever you claim?

Lady: My love who is this woman and why is she asking you so many questions?

Adamu: Fatima shut that thing you call a mouth up, keep quite before you incure my wrath. You demand and enjoy more than my wives even do and now you want to destroy my source of livelihood.

Lady: That is why am fighting on your behalf. I won’t let any lady intimidate you with any big grammar over here.

Adamu: Fatima if you don’t shut your mouth erh, I will slap you for you to see stars in your eyes. Do you know who you are referring to that way? Do you want me to lose my job? If you were sent to come and destroy me, go and tell them that you couldn’t locate me.

Lady: Lose your job? How can you lose your job when you told me that the car is yours when you started chasing after me. I don’t get something here oooo.

Adamu: Eeeeiiii are you still talking with this loud mouth of yours. Can’t you just keep your mouth shut for a minute. If I lose my job erh you will see the other side of me.

Henrietta Barnor: Adamu who is lady and don’t try lying to me either because if you do that will be the end for you?

Adamu: Madam please don’t listen to the rubbish coming out from her dustbin, I want to marry her very soon but with this kind of attitude that she is displaying I will have to think twice before hanging this rope on my neck.

Michael Ansah: Coach Adamu I hail you oooo, see I have trust in you that you can coach Black Stars team diligently. Your formation and tactics is very tight and wicked, you are the kind of person who will make Pep or Jose to change their style of play just after 2minutes of facing you on the field with your team. You be guy rough.

Adamu: Boss this your fans dier you are giving it at a very wrong time paaa ooo but all the same, madam please where are you going to now?

Henrietta Barnor: I am going to my house and as you can see, I want a taxi to board home.

Adamu: Ah then please sit down so I drop you home right now.

Michael Ansah: Ah coach what happens to your future wife now? You said something earlier on when your madam asked you her first question.

Adamu: Oh that one, she leaves down the road and I believe she can locate her way back home. Fatima please get down now, I want to go and drop my madam home as you can see.

Michael Ansah: Coach Adamu but you know that is not fair, at least you can let her get down from the car politely.

Fatima: (squeezes her face as she gets down) Please sir don’t worry at all, I know where to get him. You will come to my house and beg me for me to come and sit in your wretched taxi again and you will see what I will do to you. As a matter of fact don’t even come to my house again looking for me, it is over between the two of us and I mean every single word coming out from my mouth. I don’t know what a pretty girl like me will be doing with an ancient man like you even, whatever spell you cast on me has been broken in Allah’s name.

Adamu: Allah nagode (thank you Allah), when the monkey decides to quarrel with you, isn’t it your banana that becomes free? Ever since I started chasing you, what positive thing have you brought into my life except debt. Every weekend you make me buy you cloth for one awure to another (Islamic marriage), have you even ever requested for me to bring my clothes for you to even wash before? The only language your ears and palms understand is money meanwhile you are leaving in a single room with your parent and four siblings. You know what please as you have left my life please go and see no more, your demanding attitude been taken away from me is even a big relieve, ever since I met you how many times have you made me travel to your Mecca, always don’t you give me excuses.

Fatima: You think am a fool erh, I should be giving you the permission to be travelling to my Mecca by heart when am not your wife, do you know how many men have been in that long queue until you surfaced, if I was giving people the chance just like that I don’t think you will come and even see a glimpse of it.

Adamu: Thank you very much Fatima, you have enlighten me of my burden. The fool is considered wise when he learns to keep his mouth shut, madam please let me take you home quitely before I end up beating this foolish girl up.

Fatima: You know I was a foolish girl and you were chasing after me like a dog that you are, you think I don’t know the number of wives and the football team you have as children? Don’t bring yourself or else I will dry clean you here right now, was it because I was considering and entertaining you? If you look at yourself am I your kind of woman? Massa check and evaluate yourself next time before you approach a young pretty succulent girl like me, am out of here. Mtchewwwwww

Henrietta Barnor: Adamu you have a very long presentation to do for me, she just mentioned wives and a football team you have. I expect you to open up to me on everything conerning you and your life because I feel I don’t even know you well.

Adamu: (gets down from the car to throw insult at Fatima) Herh this girl paa you have degraded me, your small legs like khebab sticks, f****ng girl, ooooooh bleaching body girl. I knew you to be dark when I started chasing after you but now see you, housing girl like you, fanta face with coca cola body girl.

Henrietta Barnor: Adamu will you sit down and drive me home quietly. Do you now want to create a scene here?

Adamu: Sorry madam but I had to tell that yawa girl a piece of my mind.

Michael Ansah: Coach it’s okay, be a man a swallow your pain, next time you will know where to ply your trade. Please drive my lady home safely and don’t do anything silly out of anger. My dear please call me when you get home.

Henrietta Barnor: I have heard you but you also have an explanation to give when I get home. (the taxi moves away and Mike walks back to Quincy’s room laughing at what happened infront of him)

Quincy’s Room:

Quincy: You have kept long ooo, I believe she got a car before you came back? Where was the noise coming from also?

Michael Ansah: Hmmmmm please let me find somewhere to put my tired body, I have seen and encountered so many things today. I thought I had seen it all until I got to Accra some few days ago. I will tell you everything tomorrow God willing, good night my brother.

Quincy: Rest in peace bro, we shall meet at the other side of life.

Henrietta Barnor’s House:

Henrietta Barnor: Adamu so all this while you have been lying and deceiving me? I don’t think I can work with you again, please give me my car key and come for your three months salary from me tomorrow.

Adamu: Oh madam please don’t do this to me, if you take your car key that means I and my big family will starve to death. Please don’t let the anger in you to outshine the lovely person that you are, I beg you madam. If you take this car from me you will only hear of an announcement of the tragic death of a large family. Please my God sent madam kindly reconsider your decision because my life and others lies in your hand.

Henrietta Barnor: You give me the key, I will think about it, come back for an answer in 3days time. Lock the doors of my car for me, a car which is barely a year old looks like it’s five years old already, do unto others what you want them to do unto you.

To be continued

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