Blood On My Hands – Episode 4

BLOOD ON MY HANDS   EPISODE 4

 

“Talia, Talia, Talia” There is blood on your hands

“No my hands are clean leave me alone” I yelled

“I can see the blood stained on your hands” The voice screamed louder

“Who are you?” I asked getting terrified

“I am the blood that’s stuck on your hands” The voice grew louder

“Stop please stop, stop” I yelled

The voice went quiet then I noticed blood dripping off my hands. My body shook in fear as I tried running to the bath room so I could wash it off.

When I turned on the tap,blood started coming out of it. I quickly closed it.

“What’s happening?” I cried out

“You will carry that blood on your hands for as long as you shall live” The voice spoke again.

“No ,no, no” I screamed. I abruptly opened my eyes only to find myself on my bed with auntie Mary worriedly staring at me.

I checked my hands and slowly breathed out when I didn’t see any blood.

“Hey” She said handing me some water which I rapidly drank.

“Care to talk about it?”

“No” I shook my head, it seemed so real

“Lia, it’s okay to be afraid and to have night mares, you just lost your only brother in cold blood”

“I don’t want to talk about it” I whispered

“I am sure your parents will do everything to make the people who did this pay”

“I said I don’t want to talk about it” I yelled tears already streaming down my face

“Sorry I was only trying to help”

“Please leave me alone”

It had been two days since we buried my brother, my mother was still laying in the hospital bed in shock, she wouldn’t speak to anyone. My father on the other hand had been all over the place trying to act cool but I could see this was killing him inside.

What scared me the most was that he had not said a word to me from the time Jad died, I was afraid he was going to turn me in.

###############

I sat on the couch in my room with his photo album in my hands, each of our children had a photo album of their own filled with a variety of photos from birth all through out their childhood.

I sipped on my wine before opening the album and the first photo I laid my eyes on was from the day he was born.

I remember just how much pride I had felt as a man to finally have a son, not that I didn’t love having a daughter but having a son and knowing I had someone to continue my family name made me whole.

“He is everything I have ever imagined” I smiled at my wife that day as I rocked him

“I know” she whispered

“Jenny you have made me a proud man” I whispered

Unlike Lia Jad was focused, at a tender age he knew he wanted to become a Lawyer, one of the greatest the country would have.

“Daddy, after I become a lawyer I will become a President” He would often tell me

And I would smile at his innocence.

I loved both my children equally, Lia was the princess in our castle, I gave her everything she ever wanted. She wanted to travel the world and enjoy the finest things in life, school was the last thing on her mind, we let her do as she pleased till she decided she would go to college.

The one thing about Lia was her anger, she was easily provoked and most people complained about her attitude hence they preferred Jad over her.

As my children grew up I noticed how much Lia envied Jad, she wanted everything he had. She treated him more of a rival than a brother.

“I wish I was an only child” She would bluntly tell us but we would brush it of as a joke.

Now that she had managed to ki*ll her only brother I couldn’t help but feel I had not done enough as a father to show her how much I loved and appreciated her just as she was.

The death of Jad came as a shock to me, I had not let a single tear out of my eyes since he died. I just couldn’t believe he was gone, murdered like a criminal. I was at conflict between protecting Lia and sending her to Jail. A part of me cried for Justice but I couldn’t break my wife’s heart once more.

Jad’s death had broken her to the Cole, she would lose it if Lia got arrested. Speaking of Lia I had not been able to face her let alone talk to her, I was scared of what I would to her because just the thought of her made my temperature to rise.

*******************

TWO YEARS LATER

“Henry what do you want me to do? I lost a child as well” I cried when my husband walked into the room drank and hurling insults at me

“If you had allowed me to get her arrested all this wouldn’t have happened, she murdered him” He yelled

“She is also our child, we had to protect her from the cold walls of prison” i cried out

“Jenny look at me in the eyes and tell me our lives will ever go back to normal” He said holding my face so I could look at him

“I don’t know Henry, but we can try, Jad is gone, let’s pick up our lives”

“What’s their to pick up? One child is dead and one is a murderer tell me can we mend this?”

“We can try” I begged pleading with him

“We are too broken to be fixed, we can’t go back to how we used to be, Jad’s blood is screaming out to me, justice should have prevailed”

I stood by the door watching him as he yelled, I didn’t know what to do, I was helpless.

“Henry you need help” I said softy

“Oh so you think i am mad now” He yelled walking to where I was standing.

He got close to me and stared at me for a while before pulling my hand, I knew what he wanted to do so I tried pulling away but he was too strong.

He pushed me on the bed and punched me in the face and I cried out in pain.

“Let me show you what crazy people do” He yelled as he kept punching me.

When he was satisfied he let go and walked out. I sat on the bed and cried my lungs out. My lower lip was was now bleeding.

Our lives had taken an unexpected twist since the death of Jad, my refusal to have Lia arrested had cost me. Henry was no longer the same man I knew, he was always insulting and beating me up.

“What was I to do? Allow him to get Lia arrested? What would that prove? Would that bring Jad back to life? I had to do the best I could as a mother, I had to protect her even when a part of me felt like I had betrayed Jad.

##############

When I heard the yelling I knew they where arguing again and I knew how the arguing would end. He would beat her up like always

My dad had practically turned into a monster since Jad died. He was depressed but couldn’t admit it. He had ended up venting his anger on mum.

Mum had forced us to move to the farm house for a while so we could adjust to not having Jad around our house in Lusaka had so many memories of Jad. According to mum being in a new environment would help us heal faster.

I was tired of being at the farm house i wanted to go back to the city and get my life back on track.

Yes I was guilty for having killed my brother but what would holding on to guilt to do me. My father needed to understand that his anger would only separate this family apart.

We were fine before Jad was born, why couldn’t we go back to how it used to be now that he was no more?

As soon as I heard the car drive out I rushed to mum’s room. She wiped away her tears when she saw me. He face was swollen.

“I had to do something to stop my father from hurting her again.”

“I am sorry mum” I told her

“It’s fine Lia, it’s okay” she faked a smile

############

I drove out of the house fraustrated, I didn’t know what I had turned myself into. The death of my son had destroyed my perfect family, i couldn’t hold it together, I blamed Jenny for not willing to get Lia arrested and in the end i vented out my anger on her.

I was never one to lay my hand on a woman but I just couldn’t help it , I needed someone to blame someone to take the fall for what had happened and Jenny was the perfect person.

I loathed Lia so much it hurt to look at her, we had not been on talking terms the past two years, in my head she was as good as dead.

I drove around in circles I didn’t know where to go or who to talk to, I felt like I was about to explode. My heart was filled with so much anger.

“I will avenge your death I swear” I whispered to myself,I didn’t know how but someone was going to pay For Jad’s death.

 

To be continued…

 

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ALL EPISODES OF BLOOD ON MY HANDS