To Find Grace – Episode 11

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TO FIND GRACE Episode 11

Jack stood by the small window of his two roomed house he was renting near Cavendish University. He had just walked in from the last lecture of the day and felt lonely and kind of low. He held his phone to make a call. Looked at the name list, scrolling down till he saw Grace`s name. One of his senses told him to get over it and make a call, the other warned him he might end up having a heart break with what Grace would tell him. It had been days since she refused his proposal and initially he had thought he was to get over her and move on.
The fact of seeing another guy walk on to them with Jealousy gave him the impression that guy was the reason Grace was not responding positively to him.
“I need to let go now” he whispered to himself and threw the phone on a table walking out to make something for him to eat. His roommate was not yet back and he knew he wouldn’t come back probably till the following day it being a Friday.
Jack was just turning on the small cooker to make some scrambled eggs for himself when the phone vibration hit the table making him turn quickly back and grab it.
“Grace” he sighed before answering.
“Where are you?” he heard her ask after greetings
“In my room, why?” he asked wondering why she was asking him.
“I wanted to tell you that am going back home this weekend. I got to see my father” she announced calmly.
“What happened, is he bad again?” Jack asked concerned hearing her voice was so low and sad.
“I don’t know. They won’t tell me the truth but I intend to go and find out myself, I cannot stay here not knowing what is going on Jack”
“Yeah, I understand Grace, am glad you called me, been worried with your silence since we meet yesterday” he frowned
“I didn’t intend to hurt you and am sorry for what Junior said last time, he was just being stubborn” he heard her chuckle, Jack smiled feeling the easiness in her voice
“No offense taken dear, just tell me the truth, does he have anything to do with the negative response I got from you?” he asked cautiously to avoid crossing the line again
“Um, yes and no” Grace giggled.
“That is?”
“well, if you want to ask whether am going out with him or not, the answer is no. he is actually seeing my best friend” she spoke the words chocking her throat she felt awkward she was actually agreeing to the fat that the person she cared for was seeing her friend instead.
“That is a relief then” Jack responded.
“well, I got to go, just thought of feeling you I will be travelling in case you decide to show up unannounced again” Grace laughed softly.
“What time are you going? I might come to see you off” he offered quickly
“Just parking up, should be done in an hour”
“Okey will meet you at the station then” Jack answered
An hour later, Grace was getting on a bus after Jack helped her buy a ticket. She looked at him as he walked towards her with the drinks and fruits he acquired for her to be eating on the way. He looked so good she smiled to herself. Now that she had decided to pay attention to him, she stared noticing how easy and charming he was.
“What?” Jack smiled Standing closer to Grace who was still lost in thoughts analyzing him.
“I like you too you know, I think we can make good friends” she smiled and before he could respond she pecked his cheek and walked away to the bus getting on and he saw her disappear in the seats.
“What was that?” he smiled to himself touching where she had planted a kiss and walking away happily.
“Yes! Yes!” he jumped up as he walked making the guys who were seated in a small shop in intercity bus station.
Back at Jena and Ben`s house, there was sadness as Jena had refused to open up to her husband concerning what she had found out. She had retired to be the previous night wetting her pillow as she cried herself to sleep. Ben had tried to get her to tell him but she would not look twice at him.
“at least have the decency of removing those clothes and washing up so I don’t smell the scent of another woman on you” she had told him when Ben insisted she told him what was going on.
Silently Ben walked to the bathroom and he was standing before the mirror when he saw the mark that had sold him out.
“oh no” he whispered to himself realizing now how Jena had known, he had initially wondered if at all she had suspected a thing that is why she was crying, but now he knew how she knew.
“Oh God, what have I done?” he cursed himself making a fist and clenching his teeth in anger. His anger for himself for being a fool and for Chipo for luring him to do what he had vowed never to do to his wife.
“Jena I can explain, he walked to her after washing up and putting on his night gown.
“I don`t want to hear it Ben, keep it to yourself” she snapped and pulled over the blanket over her head covering her ears as she cried.
The following morning she woke up with some headache, she stood up to walk back fall back feeling dizzy thankfully Ben was close by he caught her before she could fall. Jena had developed a fever and her body was heating up. Ben could feel the heat on her skin as he held her close.
“My love, you are heating up, are you feeling okey?” he asked her but she looked at him then away
“Why? “She asked her husband tears coming down her face
“What? “He looked at her, he had not expected the question right that moment
“Why did you do it?” she asked him looking at his face.
“Um, am sorry my love, I didn’t mean to…” Ben sighed holding his head. He could not hide the truth anymore but telling her to her face he cheated was not the easy thing to do either.
“You need to be taken to see a doctor my love. You are heating up” he responded instead
“I asked you a question Ben and if you are not ready to answer it then get out” she responded her voice calm but firm it made Ben shiver in guilty and shame.
“Please Jena, just “
“You know what? I trusted you, I believed in you Ben, in fact, I never even for a day doubted you loved me, that we are a family that has the ability to withstand all pressures. For years I have known am married to a faithful and good man, now this? “She cried her heart filled with pain Ben could not look her into her eyes.
“I was lonely Jena, you shut me out and I felt lonely, I missed you so much yet you were close. I wanted to help you open up and tell me what was keeping you away, but nothing” he outlined
“So, you decided to find comfort in the arms of another woman” she completed the sentence for him and Ben was silence without any words to answer to his wife.
“Say it dammit! Say it Ben, say it to my face you cheated on me because I was down for a few weeks, tell it to my face you could not hold yourself for less than a month of my weakest moment. do you have any idea how much this means to me Ben” Jena`s voice was shaky as she cried out her face covered in tears she could not control them.
“Please baby, am sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you I swear, it will never happen again” he tried to hold her but she pushed his hand away and stood up walking about.
“Do you have an idea what I have been through after losing our baby just to start having this inner feeling something somewhere was not okey? I tried to tell you several times what I was feeling but you thought I was being insane Ben, how could I tell you what was happening when whenever I talked about Grace you had no slight belief in me?” she looked at him wiping her tears
“So this was all about Grace?” Ben asked standing up.
“What were you planning on doing Jena, please tell me.”
“No, I won’t tell, you a damn thing Ben, you have betrayed me and your kids by giving yourself to another woman. There is a reason the bible talks about a man and woman separating if there is infidelity Ben, this hurts beyond what you could ever imagine but I guess you will never feel that since I cannot do what you have done to me. I don’t even think I will ever look at you the same Ben” she shook her head
“Please don’t say that Jena, I love you, it has always been you. You know that. Forgive me my love, am sorry please let’s start all over again” he pleaded kneeling down
“Am going to tell you one thing Ben, am not ready to deal with this now, I swear to God I was so worked up trying to hide things from you and I was going insane every day. But now I know that I cannot depend on my husband to be patient with me and support me even if it meant blindly. He has his eyes on the outside and no matter how much you justify it that is what defines you”
I have not even once my whole life looked at another man, you broke my virginity and married me. I honor my vows and never look away no matter how hard it is with you. Forget about me for a while Ben. Am going to stay here but don’t expect anything from me. Am going to find my baby, God knows how much I have suffered and now I have to find another piece that has been missing in my life.” She paused
“My daughter” she added and walked away, Ben run towards her but she closed the door to the bathroom and sank down as she cried wounded.
“Open the door Jena please, what about our daughter? Will you please come we finish talking” he spoke against the door hearing her sniffing and crying inside the door.
“Go away Ben!” was her only response after several minutes of him giving his long speech of how sorry he was.
Story continues…
©Tisa Phiri
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